Treading Water

I've never been able to tread water. Even though I learned to swim as a child, I was never a very good swimmer. Several years ago I decided to overcome my fear of the water and worked hard to do it. I went to the pool and practiced - not swimming - but not being afraid of the water. After a few months I was swimming like a fish in the deep end and loving every minute of it. And now, even though I can't get enough of the water, I've still not been able to tread water.

A few months ago I started taking a water aerobics class. One lady does the exercises without a float belt. After class the other day I decided to try doing the exercises without a belt. It was hard, but I found myself quite able to do it. Suddenly I realized I was basically treading water. I quit focusing on the exercises and started focusing on simply staying afloat. I soon realized that all the other times I'd tried to tread water I had failed because I had done the "panic stroke".  As soon as I realized I could do it, and believed in myself, my motions settled into a rhythm. My heart rate evened out and I was able to treat water for 15 minutes. I could have kept going but I needed to get on with my day.

Typically when people talk about treading water they are using the phrase in a negative connotation to indicate that someone isn't moving forward in their life. On this day, however, treading water meant I wasn't drowning and it became a true life saving skill. I think often we are hard on ourselves when all we are doing is treading water. I think it's good to give ourselves credit for staying afloat and not drowning until we can get the resources we need to move in a healthy way.